What tha????

Okay...I know I already blogged once today, but I just encountered something that HAD TO BE BLOGGED. Now as we all know, taking a trip to the ladies room is basically a leap of faith. ANYTHING COULD HAPPEN IN THERE!!! And today something did!!! I figured it would happen what with me going in there every ten minutes.
SO, I go in there about 10 minutes ago, and of course it stinks. A stench that would cause most women to turn and hold it till they get home....but, the forces of nature are stronger than I. So, the bathroom is empty (thank God) and I head over to my favorite stall. i'll refer to it as stall #1. It's the stall closest to the paper towel machine. It's kind of tucked in the corner. It's cozy. I feel safest in stall #1. I look down to do the standard "seat check" and GASP!!!!!!!! The seat has been totally desecrated!!!!!! Someone has peed all over my toilet seat!!!!!!! I'm baffled!!!! Not just by the yellow ooze that is molesting the toilet seat, but the LOCATION of the attack is BLOWING MY MIND!!!!! (see fig.1) The shear mechanics of it!!! How did it get way back there?!?!? Did someone bring a little boy child in there??? (and if so, why didn't they clean it up?) Did one of our gentlemen coworkers get confused and accidentally go into the womans restroom?? (and if so, why didn't he lift the seat??) I suspect this is the handy work of one of the "Hoverers". I imagine that they, while trying to maintain balance and keep their backside atleast a foot away from the seat, stumbled backwards and upon being startled, "let loose" all over the poor toilet.
This is just another piece of evidence that the ONLY REASON that hovering toilets is necesarry is because of the HOVERERS THEMSELVES!!!!!! Just have a seat ladies!!!! Have a seat!!!!!